The Complete "Dad Year" Recordings (2017​-​2018)

by Gregory Pepper

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1.
Kitty 01:35
Radio on / Volume at 1 Driving home from the veterinarian Cold as a snake / an empty crate Driving home from the veterinarian, all alone Oh Kitty I miss you babe / Oh Kitty I love you girl Don't wanna see you go / But I can't stand to see you hurt Kitty Kitty Kitty Kitty Kitty Kitty Kitty 
2.
Good Call 01:32
I swam the lake and it was good / good call / good call I leaned my back against the wood / pretty pretty / pretty good And then I woke up and it was cold / My friends were gone and I was old I couldn't move / I couldn't breathe / And darkness was upon the face of the deep
3.
Think of a time when you were brand new / now look at your Sublime sun tattoo / the yellow ink has lost it's hue but it's still blue / caribbean blue Think of a time when you wondered who / was singing "Caribbean Blue" / bashfully you asked the shopkeep if she knew / and she knew / it's track 2 on Enya's Shepherd Moons Now stalkers stab themselves for you / Got a hundred milli and a castle too / but there's nobody to share the view you must be so blue / caribbean blue Don't be waiting for a lifetime / don't go wasting all of your life
4.
I've always been a little sensitive / ever since I was a little kid Always crying in my little crib / I had them tear stains all up on my little bib Oh damn, even my tummy sensitive / no cream in my coffee, can't have any cheese Do you believe me? I can't get high / I take a shower ever morning just to have a cry I'm squinting at the sun / this is a friend request / I swipe right / they swipe left I'm looking at the first snowflake of the winter falling in slow motion
5.
Don't read the comments / don't get in the van Listen to your worrier spirit / your worrier spirit's got a plan How long has that thing been here? / does it look like it's grown Listen to your worrier spirit / your worrier spirit ought to know Worrier spirit / worrier spirit / imagine the thing and then fear it Worrier spirit / worrier spirit / working the pedals while I steer it Don't let the sun in / and don't get out of bed Listen to the worrier spirit / the worrier spirit in your head
6.
Eyeballs / clawed apart and dangling from / human skull Bones and rotting veins are the mirror's frame Held low / with tentacles But there's no escaping from the place inside the wall The place inside the wall / the place inside the wall Guns and roses / bloody noses / Bill and Ted's journey was bogus Death plays / upright bass But there's no escaping from the place inside the wall There's no escaping from the place inside the wall The place inside the place inside the wall
7.
Is this really who you wanna be? / is this really who you wanna be? / is it an unsolved mystery? / or is it really who you wanna be? There's not a lot of years in a lifetime / I'm gonna drink a bunch of beer in the sunshine / there's not a lot of years in a lifetime / I'm gonna drink a bunch of beer in the bath tub Is this really who you wanna be? / is this really who you wanna be? / are you out raging against the machine? / and is that really who you wanna be? There's not a lot of years in a lifetime / I'm gonna drink a bunch of beer in the sunshine / there's not a lot of years in a lifetime / I'm gonna drink a bunch of beer, it'll be fine Is this really who you wanna be? / is this really who you wanna be? / is your name David or is it Steve? / and is that really who you wanna be? There's not a lot of years in a lifetime / I'm gonna drink a bunch of beer in the sunshine
8.
How does a smile even get so sharp? Looks like your face is gonna fall apart It's only time / it's just pretend / so get on stage and do it over again I don't understand / give the girl a hand You're feeling big now everyone can see The naked lady sitting on your knee It's only cash / it's just a sense / so get another hundred from the ATM I don't understand / Why don't you give yourself a hand?
9.
Oh, i just remembered, you know what? / I don't give a flying fuck Real friends: pretty, pretty good / But don't confuse that with facebook My face looks like I just drank grape crush when you say "I only listen to the early stuff" Eh man, that's rough, I can't help you / it's like you got a giant Sublime-sun tattoo And I don't mean a sublime sun tattoo / I mean 40 ounces to freedom, bruh, are you a bad fish too? I don't usually write rhymes but when I do, It's about the sound the wind makes through the pines Got a light? has anybody got a light? got a light?
10.
Funny, Eh? 02:24
Arm wrestling a drum machine / funny, eh? Vacuuming the piano keys / funny, eh? A guy walks into a bar and then sits down and drinks a beer He fiddles with the coaster and he starts to disappear I don't hear any laughter I don't hear any laughter Just a dull, unending chatter Playing a show in an empty hall / funny, eh? Diarrhea in a tuba bell / funny, eh? The bartender is talking to a woman with blonde hair In walks a Ukrainian and no one seems to care But I don't hear any laughter I don't hear any laughter Just a dull, unending chatter There's no laughter
11.
Two Speeds 01:40
I bought a bike with three speeds but you know all I got was two I never made it to the top of the charts but I'm happy here with you / I'm happy here with you My loving comes in two speeds / oh you know it goes fast and slow But I'm saving it up for you in the morning and that's all you need to know / It's all you need to know I can't always make it up a steep, steep hill and when I see another guy I swerve But I can peddle it hard and grip the handlebars when I meet you downtown after work So let's put some grease on our chains and go ahead / I will follow you No we ain't got much in this shitty world but honey, two speeds will do Two speeds will do / two speeds will do
12.
Everything will be okay / even if it's not So if the sun won't rise today / It's bad, bad luck Yeah, it's bad, bad, luck Everything will be okay / even if it's naught So if the son won't rise today / It's bad, bad luck
13.
It's easy to say when you're feeling okay / way harder to do when you're stuck with bad news Bad news / bad news  It sucks when you wait in a room with that name / tough to find PMA when you're stuck with bad brains Bad brains / bad brains 
14.
I saw this dude / who looked a lot like you / he looked a lot like you I thought I knew / the voice and the tattoos / the shirt and hairdo / but he turned around and I didn't have a clue I saw this bro / who looked like somebody I know / someone that I know The lights came on / I looked around, bro was gone / no duck, no swan / something changed but I couldn't put my finger on Do what you want to / and maybe I'll see you sometime Do what you want to / and maybe I'll see you sometime Maybe I'll see you sometime
15.
Music for babies / I'm writing the song And when I'm saying "babies" its not like I'm quoting Vince Vaughn  Avoiding the accidentals on a plastic glockenspiel One hundred and forty BPM / now you know it's real Music for little dudes that shit in their pants Are you trying to tell us something? We don't understand Should I put a sticker on the window of my automobile? Doing a hundred on the 401 / now you know it's real Yeah, you know it's real
16.
I'm pressing the car horn / it goes beep beep beep While she's singing along with Pavement in the passenger seat I am a shaved gorilla full of worry / I wanna get to the destination but I fucking hate the journey How do you do it every day? Why would you do it anyway? I sweat to God I'd go insane and stab that guy in the Escalade How do you do it every day? Why would you do it anyway? A shaved gorilla cannot explain
17.
I Get Shitty 01:46
Only one toothbrush / only one bowl Only one light on in this home Too much room in this giant bed Too many pillows for my tiny little head Only one man / only one hand I talk to the kitty but he can't understand 12 pack of hot dogs / 2-4 of beer I get shitty when you're not here I get shitty when you're not here / I get so shitty Cuz a table for one is not too much fun Even though I can wank out as loud as I want There's only one toothbrush in the toothbrush holder And now I wanna hold her
18.
Rivers 02:11
I don't mind reading between the lines You know I try / oh, I try When Rivers run dry I was on your side When they gave you a three out of five And I'll still turn a blind eye When Rivers run dry Rivers run dry Rivers run dry Rivers run dry
19.
I'm getting bored I'm getting bored I'm getting bored of the view I'm sick of myself I'm sick of myself But darling I'm not sick of you I'm waving goodbye I'm waving goodbye As my spirit becomes something new Hey Ho / Joey's saying "Let's Go!" And that sounds fine to me Who am I to disagree?
20.
Soaker 02:06
Soggy pant cuffs rolled high All the stuff you own floats by What a soaker / what a drip / what a bad scene You're looking at the scariest thing that you ever saw The waters coming up and it won't go down The waters coming up and it won't go down It doesn't wanna drain And now there's fluid on your brain Where's the plunger?  Where's the hole?  Where's it all supposed to go? You're looking at the wrath of God in the form of a flood The waters coming up and it won't go down The waters coming up and it won't go down The waters coming up and it won't go down The waters coming up and it won't go down
21.
Lucky Break 02:03
It's my job to play the chords It's my job to rhyme the words It's my job to add some verb and press "record" I play the bass line with my thumb It's my job to sit and strum It's my job to hit the drum It's not my job to stay up late It's not my job to move cassette tapes It's not my job to sit around and wait What a lucky break
22.
I got way too high / and then I got so bored I was a frightened child / and then I felt so old I loved a wicked girl / and then I was alone I tried to see the world / but I just missed my home Why can't I be in the middle? Somewhere in the middle Why can't I be in the middle? Somewhere in the middle We filled it to the brim / then we spilled the whole damn thing Filled it up again / my friend But somewhere in the middle I'm in jail And you're the chisel Doing time Fighting Fucking Eating Shitting Boredom Violence TV And I think I'd rather wait for my pancakes in silence
23.
Well I gave in / cuz I got to thinking / every gathering we have seems to end up in the kitchen / and when we bought this place we said we'd fix it up but never did / until this fall, cuz you know / we're gonna have a kid So I tore down the ceiling / popcorn stucco was buckling / the cellulose in my hair and nose and shirt was unforgiving / after two trips to the dump with Madadam we got rid of the mess / over a metric ton of stucco and lathe and insulation / man, I was impressed And then we hired these guys out of the phonebook to drywall and mud the ceiling / they were carrying on like meth-head banshees arguing and screaming The electrician from Greencor was timely and professional but way too expensive / so once that was done I hesitantly tackled the rest of it I stripped the cabinets and bought new hardware from Lee Valley and painted them / satin finish enamel white on the top / light teal on the bottom Tore up four layers of linoleum and ceramic tile right down to the original plywood / screwed 4'x4' Fiberock into that and finished with some composite / we got these black and white vinyl tiles, the kind that Gill always wanted / Man, we were up until midnight cutting on the table saw / just wondering what the neighbours thought Drove to Cambridge to get these 8' long oak butcher blocks - that I cut to size with a jig and skill saw - to use as a countertop / after we sanded and filled the gaps and treated it with mineral oil the wood's lustre really came out / we'll probably get one of those double sinks but we're just gonna use the old one for now Got some salvaged antique floorboards from our neighbours Scott and Trina / they were throwing them out / Gill sanded them down / now i'm sticking them up / and today I'm installing the last of the brass and the pulls and the hardware that Gill made herself This past weekend I sprayed loose fibreglass insulation and I'm so glad my friend Brad helped I painted the walls / I put some silicone caulk in the gaps / and I screwed in the shelves I'm almost done and it's looking alright / I did pretty well for a musician / and what's more I feel a sense of accomplishment building my girls a kitchen / I did alright for a musician / building my girls a kitchen
24.
Art collector / art collector The bullshit detector's going off Nightclub heckler / nightclub heckler If you think you can do it better then come on down If you think you can do it better then come on down
25.
White Gold 04:12
I took a good job with the city moving round the snow Lost a few hours of sleeping Drinking coffee in the cold Now all my clothes are work clothes Both thumbs cracked and sore They gave me forty hours and I asked for thirty more White gold This one's old and salty This one's fresh and dumb This one's probably okay Oh, but I hate every one Multiply the overtime with the calculator on my phone Counting down the hours until I can go home White gold
26.
27.
One, Two, Oh One One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight 2018 don't fuck me like 2017 Could you chill out with the death please? Won't you chill out with the grief? I wanna keep my friends and family and a bit of self esteem 2018 don't fuck me like 2017 2018 don't fuck me like 2017 Is that too much to ask for? Is that really so obscene? I wanna have a Merry Christmas instead of Halloween 2018 don't fuck me like 2017 But if you must make it worse Oh if you must make it worse Could you at least buy me dinner first?
28.
I've got a bottle of ink I draw the things that I think are funny and sad When life is a drag I'm happy that I've got a bottle of ink I've got a bottle to drink I talk and talk about things that I think are funny and sad When life is a drag I'm happy that I've got a bottle to drink I'm never gonna fucking let you go I'm never gonna fucking let you go I'm never gonna fucking let you go I'm never gonna fucking let you go I'm never gonna fucking let you go I'm never fucking gonna let you go I'm never fucking gonna let you go I'm never fucking gonna let you go I've got a bottle of ink I draw the things that I think are funny and sad When life is a drag I'm happy that I've got a bottle of ink
29.
Well God bless you half Portuguese girl Shoveling the sidewalk while I'm gone Waking up to a 2am alarm clock I don't wanna wake up now but I'll do it / I'll do it for her I don't wanna wake up now but I'll do it / I'll do it for her I don't wanna wake up now but I'll do it / I'll do it for her I don't wanna wake up now but I'll do it / I'll do it for her Times four / times ten / and then I'm gonna do it again I don't wanna wake up now but I'll do it / I'll do it for her
30.
Yeah, I'm coming in with my tennies on / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm bumming darts till the darts are gone / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm a dimwit / I'm a creep / I'm leaving piss on the toilet seat I got this great idea for an art show / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm an asshole / I'm a jerk The second verse is same as the first You know I'm coming in with my tennies on / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm bumming darts till the darts are gone / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm a dimwit / I'm a creep / I'm leaving piss on the toilet seat I got this great name picked out for a noise band / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm a phony / I'm a jerk Third verse similar to the first You know I'm coming in with my tennies on / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm bumming darts till the darts are gone / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm a dingbat / I'm a freak / I'm not listening when you speak Oh hey can I borrow twenty bucks I'll pay you back bro / buddy, I'm a jerk I'm a motherfucker / I'm a jerk I'm a fake fuck / I'm a jerk I'm a bohemian, man / I'm a jerk Buddy, I'm a jerk / oh, I'm a jerk Buddy, I'm a jerk / yeah, I'm a jerk
31.
I think I need a doctor / have you got a light? I can't get to sleep tonight I'm thinking 'bout the bank account I'm thinking 'bout my life I'm thinking 'bout a fist fight I had in junior high Oh well you know I could go to any place in this world but still and all I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head Until I'm knocking on that door I got restless everything / I got itchy feet Kurtis Blow is playing Basketball in my head on repeat I like slam dunks / take me to the hoop My favorite play is the alley-oop All the ghosts that haunt me are only melodies But with that said... I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head I can't get outta my head (they're playing basketball) I can't get outta my head (they're playing basketball) I can't get outta my head (they're playing basketball) I can't get outta my head (they're playing basketball)
32.
Excuses 01:55
If you don't think you can do this / you've got excuses Excuses If you're feeling worried and useless / you've got excuses Excuses Did a twelve hour shift / then an ultrasound / now the water in the toilet bowl won't go down If you don't think you can do this / you've got excuses Excuses If you'd rather sleep than make music / you've got excuses Excuses / Excuses / Excuses / Excuses And I'm never gonna tour again
33.
I'm a baby and I'm dumb But I'm the only one who doesn't know Who doesn't know I am a private eye and I'm spying on some guy who doesn't know Who doesn't know To wake up inside a nightmare where everything is wrong The cannibals are cooking up a stew So blame your older brother You should of known it all along The cannibals are looking straight at you It's me / I'm in disguise I should probably tell me wife who doesn't know Who doesn't know Who doesn't know Who doesn't know
34.
Diaper Hill 01:16
Before the sun hits diaper hill I'm gonna chill Mmm mmm So small and mad / I can't resist smiling at your little fist Mmm mmm Whadday say? Whadday say? Whadday say? Whadday say? What are you trying to say? You mad right now But I'm a dad right now It's 3am and I'm holding a bottle of breast milk in my hand right now Breast milk / you made my day
35.
What does adjuration mean? I heard you say it and I nodded I checked the definition on my phone and then forgot it If I try I can look sharp But I'll never be book smart I'm distracted by what's shiny That Operation Ivy record still reminds me All I know is that I don't know nothing So I'd love to just hang out Before the dealer flips the top card face up on the felt And I'd love to be hungry and then eat And thank whatever brought the whole world falling at our feet And then stop and stammer I'll try and fix grammar: The only thing I'm sure of is my own crippling lack of knowledge
36.
So tired but I won't go to sleep So tired but I won't go to sleep I'm putting in the leg work You know I can't speak So tired but I won't go to sleep *Please go to sleep Then the alarm goes beep Beep beep beep beep beep Then the alarm goes beep Beep beep beep beep beep So tired but I won't go to sleep So tired but I won't go to sleep They're humming Twinkle, Twinkle But I will not concede So tired but I won't go to sleep *Please go to sleep Then the alarm goes beep Beep beep beep beep beep Then the alarm goes beep Beep beep beep beep beep
37.
Like Tony Robbins in a stained white tee You spoke to me Like a big, buff Jesus towering Worship the party The prophet screams All the negative thoughts and despair Are rational crosses to bare Thank You Andrew WK I believe everything that you say Thank You Andrew WK Show me the way
38.
Dog Walker 02:11
I'm the guy that you pay to take your doggy for a walk Yeah I'm the guy that you pay to take your dog around the block I pet him like you should I tell the boy he's good And he looks me in the eye and he goes RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF He's saying I just wanna go for a walk I just wanna go outside / take me out for a walk I wanna take a shit on the ground / take me out for a walk I just wanna go for a walk I just wanna go for a walk
39.
A hotdog is a burger And a burger is a taco And a taco is a maki roll Everything is a sandwich Everything is a sandwich An open faced tuna melt is a slice of pizza And a slice of pizza is a piece of lasagna And a piece of lasagna is a bowl of pasta Everything is a sandwich Everything is a sandwich Really what is a sandwich? Everything is a sandwich
40.
I Can't Tell 02:10
I can't tell Is this The Stones or The Kinks? I can't tell Am I a guy or a chick? I can't tell Is this a stone or a brick? I can't tell And if we throw it will it float or sink? I can't tell I can't tell if it's funny as fuck or really fucking lame So I'm gonna try it again Wha-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh I can't tell Is it an elbow or is it a tit? I can't tell Is that some dirt or a piece of shit? I can't tell Did someone put something in my drink? I can't tell It's not a timor and it's not a zit / I can't tell I can't tell if it's funny as fuck or really fucking lame So now I'm gonna dress like The Crow Crow-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Crow-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh baby I couldn't tell you where the apostrophe goes Maybe between the ass and balls? Somewhere there's a finger that I lost in the spokes And what I'd be without you, well, God only knows I can't tell I can't tell if it's funny as fuck or really fucking lame So I'm just gonna wait over there I can't tell
41.
What do you think when you see a guy, slumped over, head in hands, sitting on a big, huge stone? a) He's thinking, philosophically b) He's crying like a bitch c) See? He's talking on the phone Press 1 for service in English Press the pound key if you wish to disconnect Press your thumbs up into your eyeballs really, really hard until they begin to ooze out of your head
42.
Everybody wants to be Mac DeMarco No one wants to learn guitar though Boy, when I was your age we didn't wear ball caps on stage I toured the states in a short bus, horn rims, and a bowl cut And I can remember inventing skinny jeans when I was a skinny teen Despite all my rage I'm still just a rat in a safe space They changed what it was They changed what it was And where the light shines now just hurts my eyes They changed what it was They changed what it was And I guess that's how it goes for the old guys at a rock show
43.
Stay Down 02:39
There's a ring inside my head There's a bone sticking out of my leg You know I'm beat / I'm on my back You know an arm shouldn't bend like that There's a lust for blood in this casino tonight Lost in the octagon / stay down Now amount of Monster is gonna make this alright Lost in the octagon / stay down / stay down I'm taping out / I'm gonna die When is the ref gonna stop the fight? Evil spirits haunt this arena I've felt your cold breath and now I've seen ya Lost in the octagon / stay down Lost in the octagon / stay down Lost in the octagon / stay down
44.
Maybe when we're old If the money lasts We'll get in our pod and go back Tribal warfare Dirty Water, dirty air No animals, no magic arc Dystopian oligarch You maniacs You blew it up But before the crash Before the rust It was Heaven It was Heaven on Earth
45.
46.
Cursed incantation: Rigid body Decomposition Putrid blood Lacerations Diseased human Fermentation Parasite Now Awakened You're only a head on a spine I feel like Orbison now cuz I'm crying I feel like Roy because I'm crying now I feel like Daniel out walking the cow Those gloomy high school queens  With their dresses over jeans Will know what this means
47.
I'm Dying 02:19
I'm dying Done trying There's not much time I'm holding on for you until July I'm dying Bad wiring Defective parts Lethargic and corrupt I can't restart Shutting down Won't respond Power off Force eject Spinning wheel Do not save 01000010 01011001 01000101
48.
Part One: Return of the Grack Return of the Grack We're coming back like a panic attack Straight off the top: I'm a severed dread Tie it round your finger so you never forget Part Two: I'm thinking of that cool, cold high school queen with her blue dress over her jeans and I don't expect you to know what this means Part Three: Waiting around here like a mannequin with khakis and a cardigan About as clever as a bowling pin But this dummy don't take no shit I'm lost in the thought of it Yeah homie don't take no shit Straight bitter at the thought of it Playing the world's tiniest violin while gliding on banana skin Cool like a Canadian raisin I was a grape now I'm dry as shit Feeling bitter at the thought of it Oh but this raisin don't take no shit Staring off in the thought of it I'm hanging tough here like a mannequin with plastic hair and flawless skin But I'm not sure where to begin Part Four: Sorry sorry sorry That's my never-ending story I'm in that swamp of sadness I lost my damn pony I lost my damn phone How's my homie supposed to phone me? I found a baby rabbit last night in the backyard Checked back on him in the morning He was rock hard Sorry sorry sorry So I'm digging a hole and I'm putting him in it Sorry sorry sorry So I'm bringing the grackle back It's been a minute Part Five: Hey, some changes haven't been saved Hey, Would you like to close anyway? Why do nerds grow goatees? Why is this red light on? We will always love Kamp Krusty I broke that bong Now I own that bong Hey, some changes haven't been saved Hey, Would you like to close anyway? No No No No more laptops on stage
49.
I, Parasite 02:37
I am a parasite I am the armpit I am a freelance music publicist Some blogger's dick I'm sucking it We are the barnacles on a sinking ship No life jackets, no dry land No honor among sycophants I'm expecting payment in advance Oh, did I mention that I'm also in a band We sound like Deathcab with a hint of Björk And my speech is punctuated by snorts Man, I didn't see your set because I'm too short And when I die I hope it's on a pitchfork I'll do what you ask me to do I'll say what you tell me to say I'll think what you think I should think If you pay I am a parasite I am the armpit I am a vampire I am a carcass I am a parasite I am the armpit I am a freelance music publicist
50.
I don't want much Just to hold a sacred charm Or a burrito in the park I don't want much Just to touch the candy stars Or a can of PBR I don't want much Just to hear the voice of God Or whatever's on the iPod Don't want much Don't want much Don't want much Don't want much I've got it all
51.
I couldn't before  Now I can sort of whistle along I've got a circle of friends sort of hanging on Followers and likes In some circles bigger than Christ Bigger than Jesus and Jah Bigger than Jesus Bigger than Jesus No Father verging on the altar We're gonna live forever New daughter marching on the water We're gonna live forever Probably bigger than Christ Move over Muhammad and Buddha  Bigger Than Jesus
52.
The sound of an armpit All kinds of lame shit A flood in the basement Dead Dad Christmas I wanted to cry and I wanted to weep I wanted to write the songs of the weak

about

I wrote and recorded a new song every week for an entire year. Definitely the most rewarding thing I'd never do again (as it happens, that was the year my dad died and my kid was born). It was only available to monthly Patreon subscribers but I decided to post it here to make some extra diaper money while in lockdown.

All the songs from "I Know Now Why You Cry" were written during this period. You can check out that record here: fakefour.bandcamp.com/album/i-know-now-why-you-cry

credits

released May 1, 2020

Written, performed and recorded by Gregory Pepper (2017-2018)

*Return Of The Grack produced by Factor Chandelier

Mastering and moral support by David Partridge

Cover art by Gillian Wilson

license

all rights reserved

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